Story Time

[nayrk]

Ok the way this goes is the goal is to make a story.

1) Try to keep your addition to the story 1-3 sentences long for each post
2) Please [try] to keep it clean.

So here we go:

Once upon a time, there was a midget. His name was Bruce.

[goku2057]

Bruce was the star in many migit porno films, and the ladies loved him. He was growing tired with life, love, and the world; and he couldn't stop thinking about ending his own life. his wife had left him months ago, because he had never told her about the porno films.

[nayrk]

Bruce then decided he needed a pick-me-up. So Bruce decided to go visit his good friend Jack Daniels.

[slimscane]

so he bought a bottel and when he opened it up A GENIE CAME OUT!!!!

[nayrk]

The genie said to Bruce i shall grant you 2 wishes.

[Jon]

"Two wishes? What the hell man, isn't it usualy three?" asks Bruce the midget porn star.

"Sounds like your first wish is for me to kick your scrawny little ass, punk." Replies the Genie.

Now you see, this Genie's name was Julio... and Julio doesn't take shit from anyone.

[SHNAG]

"Ok ok" said Bruce "Calm the fuck down. So two wishs eh?"
"Yep, only two" said Juilio. "Thems the rules"

"okay... I wish..... the rule about only two wishs didn't exist and i had infinite number of wishes." said Bruce
"You bastard" said Juilio under his breath
Bruce continued to say. "For my first of many many many wishes...."





p.s. I know thats from bonus stage

[Jon]

".... I wish this rash on my rectum would go away. It fucking hurts."

"Your wish is my command.... dickweed." Mumbles Julio.

[nayrk]

Noticing Julio's ill temperment for Bruce, Bruce uses another of his countless wishes.

"Julio! I wish that you would be nicer to me! said Bruce.

[goku2057]

And Julio turn Bruce and Himself into gay lovers.

[slimscane]

and they made passionate love, and grew atatched to eachother

"Julio..." said Bruce. "Yes huggy-bear?" replide Julio. "I wish we could have children," said Bruce.

"What ever you want, my little honey-bun" AND POOF!!!! Bruce turned into "Brucina" the girl....

[nayrk]

Julio and Brucina had 14 childern together.

[goku2057]

In the first year. With another set of octuplits coming every few weeks. gits, you see, it takes less time to reproduce, as teh babies are smaller. Within months they had over 100 children.

[nayrk]

Julio was in a panic, he had no idea what to call all of the childern! They needed names ASAP!

[goku2057]

So he made a giant computer, that made gallons of toxic waste a second, but named all teh children the perfect name. but soon, toxic waste filled the land, and Brucina didn't know what to do.

[nayrk]

Brucian grabed Julio and tied up all the kids and used them as a raft in the toxic waste. Brucian and Julio cried.

[Jon]

Brucina then wished to Julio that he would turn him back into Bruce and that they would become heterosexual once again.

"Lets try and forget this ever happend. K, Julio?" said Bruce sweetly, gently nibbling on Julio's ear.

"I thought we weren't gonna be gay anymore..." says Julio.

"Oh... ya, right." says Bruce quickly as he pulls his lips away from Julio's ear.

[Anarchey]

So *POOF* Bruce is back to a man. But there is only one problem, he's a badger.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS A BADGER?" screames Bruce.

"How the fuck should I know?" says the genie, as he takes a swig of the jack he came out of. "Man this tastes like spider titty."

[nayrk]

So now Bruce the midget badger was in a bind. Would he bother having a wish to turn him back into a human, or run-a-muck for awhile first.

[goku2057]

He decide to run a muck. He found the nearest man, and attacked him viciously.

[nayrk]

The man's name was Jimmy W. Jimmy never took anything from anybody and this was no exception.

[Jon]

Jimmy decides to pull out his vibrating.... toothbrush and attack Bruce the midget badger.

[goku2057]

but Bruce was a crafty mother...badger. He expected that toothbrush to vibrate, and he also brought his own vibrating...toothbrush.

[Anarchey]

Bruce thinks 'Why the fuck do be have toothbrushes?' as he pulls out his katana, slices off Jimmy's balls and head, and eats his head and takes a shit on his chest.

[goku2057]

Realizing that he just gave a Cleavland Steamer to a dead guy, Bruce quickly chopped off his own nuts, and ate them.

[Anarchey]

now he dosen't know what the hell to do, so Brian Boitano skates in. Seeing an angry, ball-less badger, he uses his fire breath to fry it, but it only makes him mad, so the bear and Brian Boitano are going to fight.

[goku2057]

Now, Bruce know Brian is indestructable to mortal attacks, so he has to think quickly. He realizes quickly that he'll have to fart the smelliest fart that has ever been farted if he wants to survive, so he bites his lower lip, and gives ithell.

[Jon]

Instead of a noxious gas exhuming from Bruce's anus, a single solitary terd pops out. Realizes the humor in it all, Brian Boitano begins to chuckle.

[goku2057]

But this was just the opening Bruce was looking for. He used this opportunity to burrow deep within Brian's anus, so he could attack from teh inside.

[slimscane]

but before he got a chance to... bruce died =D

[goku2057]

But Bruce wasn't buying it, he still burrowed deep within Brians anus, because he knew Brian was still alive.

[Jon]

Bruce couldn't see anything so he pulled out his zippo lighter. 'click' 'click'

That is all you hear before a tremendous explosion decimates Brian Boitano from the inside out. Apparently the zippo lighter ignited to immense quantity of dorment methane in Brian Boitano and caused a massive explosion.

But what became of Bruce?

[Anarchey]

He lands about 30 yards away, nice and crispy. He's fried death. So Nucks falls from the sky, and eats Bruce.

[goku2057]

But Julio realizes he loves Bruce, and brings him back to life.

[LavisBlade]

The next day was the day before halloween and bruice wanted to be something sweet, but he didnt know what to be.

Julio was of course his gay genie self.

So they travel to Walmart to find a cheap ass last minute outfit.

[SilentDeath]

But instead of bying an outfit, he bought a thong

[Anarchey]

But he got the thong out of the big and tall section, so he was one gigantic thong! He jumped in his delorian and jumped foreward a day. He want up to the first house and said "GIVE ME CANDAY!" and you who answered? Milk and Cheese bitch.

[goku2057]

Actually, it was Cheech and Chong, dressed up like Milk and Cheese.

[Anarchey]

So bruce goes in to smoke with Cheechmilk and chongcheese.

[goku2057]

And when he got inside, woomen midgits flocked to him and sexually pleased him,; All while smoking it up.

[Anarchey]

Then Bruce Campbell came in and started to ruin everyone's shit.

[slimscane]

and everyone let him, because Bruce Campbell is the MAN!!!!

[Anarchey]

So there shit being throughly ruined, the midget went back outside, to find a hobo pissing on his car. He walks up and says, "Hey why are you pissing on my car?" the hobo then turns around starts pissing on the midget.

[goku2057]

but Bruce didn't own a car, and he spent the next few days pondering on where this car he owns came from.

[Anarchey]

He finally decided to go outside, and eat a bear. Raw.

[goku2057]

He liked it, until he discovered that the bear was actually his male lover, Julio in disguise.

[Anarchey]

So Bruce cried and cried until he finally realized that by eating a genie, you get it's magic powers.

[8 Ball]

Then one night he was coming home from the local gay bar and fell asleep at the wheel. He went into a coma and died three weeks later.

[goku2057]

But brought himself back to life with his magical powers, and this time his junk was 10 times as big.

[Anarchey]

so now his junk was bigger than his actual body, so he didn't know what the hell to do.

[goku2057]

So he changed his body into a bigger more muscley version of himself.

[nayrk]

So now we have an exteremly tall and buff midget w/magic powers....who also happens to be re-incarnate.

Needless to say Bruce had some things he wanted to do first and foremost, ride the rides at the carnival.

[Anarchey]

so he goes on the tilt-a-whirl. And he throws up, all over god. Now god isn't going to take this, so he sends bruce to hell.

[goku2057]

ANd bruce finds that hell is code for lots of naked women.

He thanks god, and begins putting his abnormally large tool to good use.

[Anarchey]

but one of the women happen to be a cannibal, so now bruce dosen't have a bat for his baseballs.

[nayrk]

but since he magic powers now he just makes a new one.

[goku2057]

And Bruce "Magically" killed her. (read: Magically as in beat her to death with his giant man meat.)

[LavisBlade]

Bruce discovers a competition in the outerworld, the winner gets to travel back to the earth realm if he wins against the master demon himself Michael Moore. Bruce first must defeat others who also signed up in the competition, they call this tournament Mortal Kombat. lol

[nayrk]

But as the first trial Bruce must "test his might"

[Anarchey]

his opponent, Saddam Hussien, headbutts the stone, and it barely cracks. Bruce flops his man meat down on the stone, and it breaks in two. He then eats Hussien.

[goku2057]

And by eat, he means viciously rape with his gigantic wang.

[Anarchey]

so now it is time for the next battle. It is bruce against Superman. Well supes uses his super speed to get behind bruce without him even knowing it, and then he gives bruce a punch in the back of the head. Now bruce, having magical powers, just gets pissed off.